And so it happened that I came across Joan Didion and Abbas Kiarostami in the space of a couple of weeks while living in Beirut. When watching Kiarostami's movie A Taste of Cherry only a couple of days after finishing Didion's novel Play It As It Lays, I saw many parallels between Maria and Mr Badii as they drove across winding roads, acting as their source of refuge. I felt so compelled to write about these two works of art together because I feel a strong conviction that they need each other. Perhaps by placing these two characters on the same page I can provide a sense of solace to one another or if only a short respite from their lonely rides ahead. For both Maria and Mr Badii the road acts as a relief from the tortures of daily life. While Mr Badii is more literally finding his escape on the road through his search for an accomplice to his suicide, Maria also uses her rides on the ominous Californian highways as a search for the end, as if by continuing to drive into the distance, the horizon at the other end might engulf her at some point and allow her to be hidden and swallowed into the darkness forever. I think most people engaging with these two characters can relate to their painful apathy, numbness and clear sense of reality to the monotony of living. For Mr Badii, the chilling rationality and emotionless approach to his suicide renders it both hard to reckon with his decision and to question whether it is in fact the only rational choice. Our obliviousness to the force pulling him to end his life and the equally unconvincing reasons not to, whether it be the religious sin or to experience next seasons blossoming taste of cherry force us sympathize with his difficulties of simply finding someone to help. It seems almost an injustice when those he encounters deny him his simple request.
My college literature professor once instilled upon me some useful advice. Amidst our teachings on the literature of Samuel Beckett, he preached of the importance of boredom, and how the acceptance of a state of boredom at certain moments of time is uniquely valuable and necessary. All too often boredom is seen negatively, but from that day I have gained a respectful understanding of this emotional state and have often found much comfort within it. Living among an era of wellness and self-love leaves little space for the necessary humane acceptance of the tortures of daily life, one of which is boredom. The clarity with which Maria and Mr Badii see the world seems disconcerting to those they encounter. Their apathetic acceptance of the banality and boredom of life is met by denials by those around. They desire the peace to not be met with these prophetic spells of meaning and existence, just as I believe many people often feel the desire to silence the dogmatic voice to be happy and live a meaningful life. Accepting this reality can often feel rather liberating, rather than hopeless and suffocating.
Maria and Mr Badii have each made a choice. Maria accepts and sees the world and her life as it is and decides to keep living. Mr Badii sees himself and life as it is and decides to stop living. Neither choice right nor wrong, noble nor weak, permitted nor denied.
